Sissy shame - one night stands

You are away on business and you just cant help dressing up. In fact you have really been trying to be as passable as possible. You are only eating low fat high estrogen foods, grown out your hair, learned to move and present as a woman. The need has been growing each little improvement, each little adjustment you have made has led you closer and closer to this moment. 

Your mind is racing as you walk along the hotel corridor, what are you doing, fear washes over you, then shame, then the desire to feel, to expereince sex as a woman, you blush and giggle nervously, you have worked so hard to perfect your female persona. You mind races back across the 3 years of effort, the running, the yoga, the diets, the endless hours perfecting your style and makeup. 

As you search for his room number you smile recalling the flirting at the hotel bar, you start to feel a deep warthm glowing inside, creating a feeling of need, a feeling of lust, he was so hunky, and take charge, you loved how he looked at you, almost undressing you, you loved how you just flirted so naturally, flicking your hair, bitting your lower lip, gently brushing his thigh, giggling at his jokes. You felt a heat inside as he smiled and told you how beautiful you are. 

Then he got up and said he needed to get back to his friends, that he would be finished in an hour and would love it if you would join him in his room for a drink. Room 134 was the last thing he said, as he walked back to the table and his friends. 

It took all my resolve to stay seated at the bar and finish my drink, I was blushing and my mind raced does everyone in the bar know I have just agreed to see a man in his room? 

I mustered all the confidence I had left and stood picked up my purse and strutted out of the bar and towards the hotel lobby and the lifts to the rooms. The moment the lift doors closed I started to panic, I rushed to my room and shut the door and burst into tears, get a grip, what am I doing, oh my god what am I doing, I whispered. The shame washed over me and I was lost in mind games locked in one position not able to move, not able to decide what to do. 

Somehow I am here now, somehow my mind and body acted independently, as if on auto pilot I cleaned my face, reapplied my makeup and freshend up and here I am walking towards his room...

 

130, 131, 132, 133... ok I am here, I watch my hand raise and there is a knock, my hand did that I smile as I look at my nails so pretty I love frenchtip, classic and elegant.

 

 

I find myself almost dancing in anticipation, I have to control myself and stop myself from giggling this feels sooo good and yet sooo naughty and yet sooo right and yet sooo shameful. In the split seconds I wait at his door, a couple walk pass and I blush, they know and I am again filled with shame, what if he hurts me, what if I am left broken, my thought is cut off as he opens the door.

I am invited in.  I returned to my room later that night, I could not bear to look at myself in the mirror to take off my clothes or to remove my makeup, I simply slept. 

I woke early, my thighs were covered in dried cum, my face and hair also. I just had to shower the smell of sex deep in my nostrials, I was sore, my lingerie ruined, stained and ripped and my ass well it hurt. 

I cleaned up showered and placed a do not disturb on my door handle and dressed in a simple cute cotton sleep shorts and vest and thigh high socks, blushing and full of shame I collapsed on the bed in my room and slept.

Sissy shame is a strong motivator, my dreams were full of cock and shame. I woke at midday to find myself in such conflict I had loved the expereince and needed so much more and yet the shame. How does a woman deal with the morning after? How do you reconcile the wanton behaviour with the cold light of day how?  

This little post was shared by Caitlin, a new gurl I am training. She raises an interesting question how do we deal with the night before in the morning? We have all heard of the walk of shame, or tutted at woman who have come to work in the same outfit from the night before. 

 Well here are some of my thoughts and expereinces lets assume you have stayed over. 

The first thing I always notice is how dried cum feels on my skin, then I feel thirsty, so I tend to want a glass of water to drink, anything to help remove my hungover. 

At this point I realise I am not at home, I kind of know it but it takes a moment to sink in. At that point I realise there’s a real live human next to me, he has a beard.  I don’t remember a beard.

Oh, hang on, inner thigh carpet burns … I remember a beard.  

Where is my phone, I’ll check my phone 7%  

We’re both totally naked, Where the hell are my knickers?

… And where’s the loo.

I need to wee so badly.

Can I retrieve all my clothes without him waking up?

Or seeing me *totally* naked in broad daylight.  What the hell was his name? Maybe I’ll call him honey

Too naff.

Darling?

… Ekk

Maybe 

Hey you?

… Argh.   

Why is my bum sore? Did I let him? Oh, crap, I did, when will I learn!

I’m still horny

Maybe I’ll wake him with a blowjob.

I wonder how big his penis is.

I should know this.
 

There’s a condom on the floor

PHEW.
 

He’s awake, I should say something

Hey, you …


And make up something about having to be somewhere grown up

Oh good, he’s bought my excuse/is relieved I’m making an exit.  Seriously, where the hell are my knickers?! 

What’s that noise?

Oh man, he has flatmates. Oh god there all staring, why am I blushing so much. I so need to pee, but I just want to get out of here and buy some knickers on the way home and check my bum, it really hurts. 

Bye then…